Ditto

I don’t have a clear memory of the day that we met;
But we have memories since then that I’ll nrver forget.
Even though you aren’t affectionate, I know that you care;
I know it from the way you spend hours perfecting my hair.
I know it from the way you get me home when I’m drunk;
I know it from the way you sort out my clothes and bin the junk.
I know it from the way that you’re always honest with me;
I know it from how you’ve made me countless cups of tea.
I can’t believe that we’ll never walk to school together again;
Or sit upon the hills outside while you warm me of certain men.
But in the last years, I never realised how close we were;
And even though it’s been a while, times became a blur.
So before you go and start your new adventures without me at uni;
I will pray and hope that you’ll never forget about me.
Have fun and don’t drink too much and I think that you know;
But I have to remind you one last time that ditto.

He's back

He comes back all the time, I can never get away.

Every time he comes to visit, I feel forever he will stay.

He weighs me down, I can’t escape from his mighty grip,

My legs are shaking and trembling is my bottom lip.

He stops me eating and getting out of bed,

Emotionless, numb, in pain I am led.

He hands me a blade, makes me do crazy things,

His depressing voice in my head forever sings.

I can’t see a way out anymore 

I see him coming at my door.

I can never get away.

I feel forever he will stay.

Kindness

Talk about me with my back turned,
What real friends are is what I've learned.
Say what you want because I know,
That this is part of your sick show.
You want to be liked by everyone,
By the end, you'll have no one.
Because you push aside those who're kind,
And soon enough you will find,
That you are the only issue here,
And reality will be your darkest fear.
All alone every single day,
No pity from me, just keep away.
The trust I gave you is all gone now,
I hope you die alone, this I vow.

Twinkle

Twinkle twinkle my little star,
Above with God is where you are.
I see you every night when I look up,
But never see you close-up.

Twinkle twinkle my little star,
Please let me know how you are.
As I can no longer talk to you,
So I do not know what to do.

Twinkle twinkle my little star,
Can you hear me? You're so far.
But also close within my heart,
And everything that I start.

Twinkle twinkle my little star,
You're not here, its too bizarre.
But I am learning every day,
How to live with you away.

Twinkle twinkle my little star,
So pretty tonight yes you are.
When I see the stars I start to cry,
As I'll never know when to say bye.

Addicted

'Addicted'
Thats what they call me lately,
But thats not true you'll soon see.
Its not an addiction it is only love,
A feeling sent from above.
Addiction is scary but this is not,
You don't love me, that I got.
I can't help the way that I feel,
But this love is not a big deal.
I think of you all the time,
For you, mountains I would climb.
This is not an addiction, this is love,
But you don't feel the same.

Memories

Memories of you and me,
Memories is all I have left.
I shut my eyes its all I see,
For these, I feel blessed.

Memories aren't enough,
I want to hold you again.
Being alone has been tough,
Everyday is full of rain.

Memories are why I smile,
But also why I cry.
You've been gone quite a while,
Why leave me? Just why?

Memories will stay with me,
What you couldn't do.
Come back is what I plea,
Because I need you.

When I Next See You

When I next see you it will be very strange,
I can only do it once I've made a change.
The only time we can talk again is very far away,
But I still dream of this moment every single day.
I know you're looking down on me as I say these words,
I hear your soothing voice in the cooing of the birds.
But I cannot see your kind face for a little while,
And without it every day it gets harder to smile.
But times a healer that what they all say,
If only it didn't have to be this way.

When I next see you, I will leap into your arms,
And listen to your sweet words and charms.
I dream of this moment, I can't help it right now,
And I will think of you always this I vow.
But it still scares me I cannot see you for ages,
To be normal, I have to go through all seven stages.
The pain in my heart will not go away soon,
But seeing you watch over me from the face in the moon.
Many things give me short term relief,
But nothing can stop this feeling of grief.

Paintbrush

Late at night, when she can't sleep,
That's when depression will begin to creep.
So to combat, she starts to get artistic,
Painting away seems so simplistic.
Her paintbrush swirls red across the canvas,
Feeling relief from all her mind madness.
The paint soon starts to drip from the page,
Showing how she's escaping from her cage.
Not all artists are the Van Gogh kind,
But paint alone at night is what you'll find.

Childhood Friends

Running through big green fields full of trees,

Back in my childhood was when life ran with ease.

Not a care in the world as the wind blew in my hair,

No stresses or wishes of which needed a prayer.

Laughter filled the fields from my friends and I,

We'd fall down and watch the clouds drift in the sky.

When we were both so young many years ago,

And what would happen to us we'd never know.

Schools placed us in different classes, away from each other,

How unfair this all seemed I would cry to my mother.

I made new friends with the same hobbies as me,

The sadness I had shortly felt turned back into glee.

I'd go out shopping, to the cinema and on walks,

We'd stay up late at night and talk stupid talks.

These new friends found a special place in my heart.

I hoped from these I never would part.

But in all the excitement of these new friends,

The friendships from before met sharp ends.

Time went by as I missed them so dearly,

But we've all moved on- this I could see clearly.

The memories of us running around I never forgot,

Even if these friendships were now only a thought.

I knew they were happy in how they grew up,

But I couldn't help myself wanting to meet back up.

Years went by but I never did forget those days,

The icky grass stains and the blinding sun rays.

So I took a leap of faith and call on you again,

I didn't want those years of love to go down the drain.

With welcoming arms you held me so close,

Why we didn't do this sooner no-one knows.

Time doesn't matter when you love someone like this,

And every time that I see you it still feels like bliss.

Lost Girl

The lost boys get saved by Peter Pan,
But for lost girls there is no plan.
Captain Hook can still come for us,
But no-one cares to make a fuss.
Tinkerbelle is safe under Peter's wing
The rest are exposed to everything.
Lost girls exist but not far far away,
We're the people you meet everyday.
The girls who have no place to go,
Especially when they feel so low.
If only there was a female Peter,
To help save all the girl dreamers.
Because no-one knows lost girls are also a thing,
But we have no Peter Pan to save our skin.

I Feel You

I feel your presence everywhere I go,
I feel you on desert sands and fields of snow.
I feel your presence when I go to your home,
I feel you on all the earth that I roam.
I feel your touch upon my shoulder when I cry,
I feel you looking back when I stare up at the sky.
I feel your loving eyes looking upon me,
I feel you smile when I giggle with glee.
I feel your warmth whenever I get sad,
I feel you soothing me when I start to get mad.
But some days go by when I cannot feel you there,
And my heart gets sad wondering if you still care.